Complaining To Friends Increases Girls’ Misery

Interesting. Looks like talking to friends about problems may actually increase misery which contradicts popular belief. According to University of Missouri-Columbia, “co-rumination” — in other words, excessively discussing problems with close friends — appears to increase anxiety and depression in young and adolescent girls. Boys seems to be immune against such effects.

However, this does mean that girls should not confide . What is interesting is that sharing problems with friends strengthened their friendships — but it also increased their feelings of depression and anxiety which is however, not necessarily clinically anxious or depressed.

How Parents Can Help

Keeping the importance of a solution in mind could go a long way in staving off additional anxiety and depression.

“Parents do well to listen to their children and help them seek solutions — and to encourage them to see all aspects of a situation, not just the negative,” Okiishi of the University of Iowa said.

“Ineffective complaining is sign of depression and anxiety rather than a major cause,” he said. “Over time, ineffective complaining can add to the burden of depression as people fell more helpless and less well understood.”

“The most important thing is not to get too bent out of shape about your daughter being involved in one of these relationships, unless her ability to function in one way or another — her grades, her sleeping patterns — starts to deteriorate,” said Dr. Redford Williams, director of the Behavioral Medicine Research Center at Duke University School of Medicine.

Emory’s Kaslow agreed. “If it’s a little anxiety, a little sadness, that’s just part of normal life. It’s part of growing up.”

Via AbcNews

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